Trouble Is Everywhere

I'm just popping my head up a bit to share some good news, in chronological rather than order of importance.

1) The Student Loan issue has been "solved" in that I now owe thousands of dollars to family and not to a collection agency that will randomly have my bank account frozen. We've also ending our banking relationship with the previous bank. Not because they froze my bank account on the 30th of the month. That bit I disagree with but understand. No, because I called them up to have them take money out of my account to apply to the loan, they took the money out of my account electronically and then froze my account for 10 days to see whether or not the money would clear. This was not what was discussed over the phone, and it makes no sense because the money was taken from my account before they froze it again. So, you know. I bank elsewhere now, and most of Don's investments have been moved as well. (The only things not moved are long-term investments that are locked in for another year, but those will go as well.)

2) Don's vocal cords are getting better! He saw the doctor, and this is what he says: "Whet he thinks is happening is that the nerves have come back but the ones that tell the cord to close and the ones that tell it to open are all firing at once. This is resulting in the chord mostly staying rigid which is why its worlds better but not 100% of pre surgery. The nerves might sort them out a bit more so that the chord starts to move a little more but the important thing is that its not going to get weaker." I know I've mentioned this before but having actual medical doctors say "yes, it's getting better, no, it's not a fluke, and it won't get worse" has been a huge weight off his mind.

3) My PhD apps are almost ready to go. I've got two more days for my UofA transcripts to arrive, but all of my letters of reference are packed and ready to go, as is my writing sample, CV, various bits of paperwork, thesis proposal, statement of intent, etc etc etc. The post office tells me I can have it shipped Priority Next Day AM if I get to the post office before 4pm Thursday. (The technical deadline for both universities is January 15th. [The last one is January 31st.] January 15th is a Saturday. *sigh*)

So, yay for me. Things are coming along nicely. Chapter 2 is doing really well. My sleep is a bit screwed up (I stayed up too late last night and thus couldn't get myself out of bed this morning to hit the Leg Library), but generally things are Good. My wee laptop is totally a goner, but I'm taking advantage of the university's computers. (Right now that's irritating me because there are many students here who have confused "quiet conversation" with "Make a lot of noise" but I just need to wait them out.) I'm a bit lonely (I misssssss youuuuu) but I've been working and reading a lot, so I guess that's good.

♥

I am so very very very very very stressed about PhD applications. All I can think of is getting that tiny little "Thank you for your application but you are a terrible student and should give up on academia because you are incompetent" letter. Oh brain, you are so awesome, thank you.

I keep reminding myself that one of the professors at York actually wants to work with me, and the other two I talked to were very interested in my work, as was the person I talked to at McGill. I remind myself that I got into Dal on less. I remind myself that Dr T and Dr B would both tell me if they thought I wasn't worth writing letters of reference for, and both have been very encouraging. And yet, the failure brigade in my brain is doing a great job of drowning out the logic.